Total Con.sec.ration To Jesus though Mary

Our Parish is doing Tot.al Con.secration to Jesus through Mary on the Feast of the Immaculate Conception, Dec 8th.

Total Conse.cration being entirely new to me, I was kind of apprehensive. But my husband very well knew how important it was to Consecrate ourselves completely to Jesus through Mary. We began preparing for the Conse.cration by getting hold of the book  "Prep.aration for Total Cons.ecration according to Saint Lo.uis Marie de Mont.fort". The book has prayers for 33 days mostly taken from St. Lo.uis de Mont.fort's True Dev.otion to Mary. This is one of the best books I have read.

The Consecration takes place on important Feast Days. There are six suggested feast days but other Marian feasts can also be used:

1. Feb 2nd - Presentation of Jesus
2. March 25th - Feast of Annunciation
3. April 28th - Feast of St. Louis de Montfort
4. May 31st - Visitation of the Blessed Virgin Mary
5. August 15th - Feast of Assumption
6. Dec 8th - Feast of the Immaculate Conception

As we began our preparation, I began to realize that this was not an easy task. If I had to completely give myself to Jesus through Mary, it meant I would have to surrender myself to Mary, and to Jesus through her without any reservations or inhibitions. It meant I would be giving Mary permission to discipline me and mold me so as to be pleasing to Jesus. It meant surrendering all our thoughts, words and deeds to Mary - yes including our Infertility. It meant giving all that we have and will ever have to Mary for eternity.

I am filled with fear - fear of letting go, fear of complete submission, fear of not being in control but then I realize this is the most prefect and certain and shortest way to be united to Jesus.
What better way to Jesus than through Mary? Mary - the perfect disciple of Jesus who was closer to Jesus than any other disciple.
And just as this blogger wrote : "Mary wants something of each person and specially of those struggling to conceive. She speaks in signs and in God incidences, yet we do not see it. "

Please say a prayer for me as I have been tempted to postpone the Consecration because I feel I am not ready. I feel unprepared to undertake such a great ordeal. I know it is the evil one who is trying to hold be back from Consecrating myself to Jesus through Mary. But I trust in the Lord.